We Can Grow from Conflict

     If you have ever been told that having a successful marriage or family means no conflict then you have been taught wrong. There will always be some sort of conflict or disagreement at one point or another especially between spouses and families. However, this does not necessarily have to be viewed as a bad thing. People can learn and grow through trials, conflicts, and mistakes. When two people talk about something that may be bothering them a solution can better be found then if the problem was ignored completely and would probably just continue to get worse. It is like making a mistake and then knowing not to do that again. Solving arguments can help people grow into knowing how to solve problems better. Arguments or disagreements handled well can help strengthen relationships rather that hurt them.

    This is an important mindset to have while being part of a family because we all make mistakes. Instead of feeling like a let down or disappointment to your family, you can learn and grow from hard experiences. Not only can this mindset be applied to family life, but also to work, school, and any other area of life. Think back to a trial you've had, preferably with a family member. The trial was probably really hard to go through. However, looking back on it, think about how it helped you grow as a person. Maybe it made you more aware of that person's needs, or helped your communication skills. Also consider how your relationship has been strengthened since then or maybe even weakened if the situation has gotten worse and what you can do to make it better. Communication is key in turning trials into a learning experience. Doing this with your family and talking to them will help strengthen your relationship in a positive way. It creates roots and memories within your family that will help you grow stronger.

    While in a tense situation you might have heard someone say "one day we'll laugh about this." A better way I like to think about it is, "one day we'll learn from this." While in a tough situation it can be harder but as you reflect think about trials that have taught you something. Examples of this would be independence, determination, or the importance of taking time for yourself. Whatever it is, it can help you grow as a person if you let it, rather than holding a grudge or letting it come between you and your family.

    Conflict can also help create better solutions for everyone involved. Whatever the problem is it most likely won't get fixed if it is never brought up. It is okay to bring up an issue or dilemma that you are facing with your family so everyone can help you or help come up with a solution. This is where building a foundation comes in. The more you discuss with your family about trials or things that bother you the more comfortable it will get. Arguing in a relationship is never fun and it would be a lot better if an issue was able to be talked out. The more you do this a stronger foundation can continue to be built.

    In conclusion, family is a strong unit that can help you grow as a person, even through conflicts and arguments. Getting through these in a healthy productive way can strengthen the family instead of harm it. Take time to think how you can help avoid huge conflict and help your families foundation through conflict without it being harmful. Some ways this can be done is through communication, taking time to cool off, and being open to new ideas and suggestions. I hope that we can all grow and learn through conflict.